So my daughter starts first grade next week,is this a reason to panic?Mind you,the question is meant for me,not her.Being a working mother,I have sent both my kids to nursery before their first birthdays,so this is certainly no separation anxiety.I wake up in the middle of the night and I think how different proper school will be from the fun life of KG and nursery.Going to first grade means there's studying to be made and homeworks to be done everyday.There's older kids who push and shove in recess,and teachers who frown and shout in class.There's no swings and slides and no costume parties.There's a deadline for arriving ,and not meeting it will result in nasty comments from teachers and principals. How will Raya be able to take all that and adapt?In fact Raya has always been a very sociable child,and has managed to get used to all the different places she's been in record times,so why should I worry?It's not like all the other kids will be having fun while she's stuck in this boring routine,so why am I this concerned? I have learned, through trial and error,that my kids need to be prepared.The more they know about something,the more relaxed they are when they face it.And somehow,I have ,so far, neglected this fact with regards to this new school routine.The first sign of discomfort on Raya's side was the other day when we went to buy her school uniform.I don't know what she expected,but she definitely wasn't amused when she saw the knee length grey trousers and the white shirt with buttons and a collar.Perhaps she was hoping for a pink skirt and flowery top,and she wouldn't try that awful fabric on. My daughter happens to be a very girly girl,and that look is probably the end of fashion to her.I got upset,and scorned her for giving me a hard time trying them on,while in fact,I hated them myself.How did I expect her to react?Did I seriously think she was going to fall in love with it and be excited about it,when she probably doesn't know that a uniform is a mandatory thing that all schools enforce? I now see my mistake and realize I should have started my lectures a bit earlier. But this is still not the real reason behind my anxiety.Sending my daughter off to school is putting a lot of emotional stress on me, because I am afraid I will not be able to perform my role as a mother as well as I want to.Every othe mother I know,who has older children,has stressed the importance of the first few years in kids education.I am afraid I might not have the patience to sit there and teach.I'm afraid I might not be able to make her brother realize that her studies is not something he can interfere with ,I'm afraid I might not be able to give her all the attention she needs to shine ,when she certainly has all the potential to do that,and these are not my words.Her teachers in KG were very impressed with the amount of knowledge she has for her age and her willingness to learn,so what if I'm the one to mess all that and not live up to the level of care she needs to succeed.All these concerns haunt me, and then I hear myself thinking,and I regret turning into that sort of person.So what if she's not the best in everything?I never was. Neither was her dad. We were both very good in school, but neither was the best all the time.There were times when we'd excell, there were times when we'd lag behind.But this never made our parents look down upon us.We both had a fun childhood,without the pressures of performance from our parents,They helped us improve,but never made us feel inferior if we didn't achieve the exact set goals.Was that too bad?Didn't we turn out all right afterall?(at least we'd like to think so).So from now on,I won't panic,I will try to take things one step at a time,and not worry about the pride that comes with being the mom of the best student in class,especially in parent teacher –meetings.Though that would be such an ego booster!!!Well,who knows?Inshalla!
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from Jordan
said:You know, I always felt like I was one of the "smart kids" growing up-- at least that's what my Mom told me, and why should I not believe her? The funny thing was, last year, I was throwing away some old papers and came across my report cards from my early years of school. I read some of the teacher's comments like, "Rebecca's not the SLOWEST kid in class" and was kind of shocked to learn that I was a "slow starter" when it came to academics. But I never would have known it by the praise and encouragement I got at home. Eventually I did "bloom" academically, and I think Mom's encouragement had a lot to do with it.
Don't worry, you'll do great... I mean, SHE'LL do great. :)
from Jordan
said:Well maybe the 1st few days may be hard but when she finds a partner to play with she'd enjoy her time.Concerning later stages well you must guide her through studying and behaving with the public,but there would come a time where u must walk away and let her make her own decisions...
from United States
said:I think she already has a great role model! You'll be surprised at how much kids excel when they are part of loving and nurturing family. I can sense the high value you place on education. Continuing to hold that passion would be the best thing you could do for her. With that she has to potential to reach the stars and beyond.
I would take it one day at a time and remember it's only first grade. It's important to let kids be kids and not put too much pressure on them to be the best student in the class....bombarding them with knowledge to no end. We should not fall into the trap of trying to mold them into what we think is best for them or what we want them to be. They need to learn from their mistakes. They need to "fall" a few times in order to learn to get up. There will be many opportunites for these learnings, but for now let them enjoy growing up and the first few steps of the rest of their lives!
/
I can meet someone and 5 minutes later forget their name, but all of my teachers, I never forgot any of theirs. My first grade teacher was Mrs. Chang. I remember very few specific things from her class, but I'll never forget that glowing smile from behind those thick glasses that greeted me every morning and always pushed us to do our best. And my 6th grade teacher, Ms. Frey, who made me write 5000 times "I will now chew gum in class". My hand hurt for a very, very long time. That summer, my dad sent me to school in the summer while all the other kids went on family vacations, all because I got a B+ on my Poland report. But during summer school I got a A+ on my report on Jordan. I imagine he would of killed me if I got anything less.
from United States
said:Salam,
I sent my daughter Laila to K5 this past Monday, and she asked me: "baba keef iza badalny afakkir feek ew ma ba2dar arakiz ma3a el teacher??"
Ofcourse she is the only who knows how to break my heart in a word or two. Well Monday was such a long day I kept thinking of her, ya tara how is Laila coping with the school/uniform thingy?!!
I was the first to wait for his kids outside school I think they get off at 3 I was there like 2:15.
But she was happy and first day went great, second day she did great and made a new friend but she doesnt know her name yet.
WOW!! I mean my father never been to my school ever, lol
Different times I guess.
I'm praying for you Salam.
Peace
from Jordan
said:Thanks,meemo,you're the best!
True,Rebecca,with all the support I was given too,I would have thought i was the best ever!Thanks.
luai,thnak you,for such nice words.
Hamede,both me and her need the luck,,thanks.
Palforce,keep us updated on laila..she really got you there what if I keep thinking of u?haha
from United Arab Emirates
said:As long as you are concerned then you know what should be done. Being aware of the challenge would be the major part. I'm sure you will make it as you sound like a great mom. It wont be easy, but you can always make it work ;)
Gooooooooooood Luck
Being a mom freaks me out alread and am not even engaged nor married :)
from Jordan
said:You know ramroom,it is scary as hell,but quite rewarding..best feeling ever!3o2balek!
from Jordan
said:iam sure all parents want their kids to be the best in everything, but i think they should not stres on them that much, let them be what they want not what mother and father want:D good post
by the way still waiting ur call.
from United States
said:Salam, oh the things that keep mommy's awake at night! You are a terrific mom and Raya is blessed to have you. I remember the same concerns for my son last year, and he did complain about no field trips and coloring time, but he somehow understood he is a big boy now and actually does his homework more diligently than his older sibs.
Little Kinzi starts KG1 this year, and I'm laughing as she sort of got big-eyed at the GRAY hair ribbons to make her uniform. What, no pink? No lace?
I'll be praying for you too. May God bless you with His perfect peace, and keep your mind focused that His plans for you are good.
from Jordan
said:Hello salam ...
RELAX ITS NOTHING , ITS FIRST GRADE :)
ask her to collect things she thinks about school , like images , write things , draw things and create a story of them and give her clues about what she'll see so u make a game of it that you relax and she aswell ...
make her feel she owns the accomplishment of First grade issue ..like wow
am sure you'll do good as your mama did for you ..
AND GO GIRLY IN HAIR RIBBONS AND IN SHOES , colored socks ...add the flavor to school grays your way *
from Jordan
said:Hello salam ...
RELAX ITS NOTHING , ITS FIRST GRADE :)
ask her to collect things she thinks about school , like images , write things , draw things and create a story of them and give her clues about what she'll see so u make a game of it that you relax and she aswell ...
make her feel she owns the accomplishment of First grade issue ..like wow
am sure you'll do good as your mama did for you ..
AND GO GIRLY IN HAIR RIBBONS AND IN SHOES , colored socks ...add the flavor to school grays your way *
from Egypt
said:Asalam 3alaykom,
Salam..i'm exactly in your shoes..my daughter is going to school in two weeks and although i had the same butterflies in my stomach when my son went last year..nothing is changed i feel the same as u described..
They are different kids after school..not better or worse scale..no..just different..you'll be discovering new things about your daughter that will astonish you and make you more proud..school is the real time for parrenting and raising a personality..as dealing with kids and teachers are her first step in life...it'll be great in sha2 allah..best times ever:):)
+ Palforce..you brought tears to my eyes..may allah bless you..as a great father is a gem!!
from United States
said:Salam again,
First day at school they have a parent meeting at the library called coffee and Klenix, to get parents who are worried about their kids to sit togther and talk like we doing now. LOL
The caller, sorry I made ya shed a tear. I love Laila, she knows it and she knows she got me khatem in her fingers.
The best thing I value about her is, she is never scared from me, but she is worried that whenever I'm mad at her we are not friends any more.
Iffttt, why are we talking about this sissy stuff...( ihhmm ihhhmmm YA WALAD YA 3OMAR TA3AL NEL3AB XBOX).
OK I feel manly again.
Peace 3an sa7.
Why is it always the mother's duty to teach the kids? I just think that with both parents working, this should be a mutual task at home. Just a thought!
from Jordan
said:Hi Salam,
I've been there. but relax...
wait until you face five grade exams...!!! hahaha
Anyway, my daughters too need to be prepared.. before some time. I am facing the problem of back to school adaptqtion. However, we'll manage.
Raya is a pleasant and intellient girl, you an amazing mother, and samer is great... so what to expect.! excellent performance by Raya. Good luck to all, and you take it easy and relax.
C Ya
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from Jordan
Don't remind me of the ugly uniform we used to wear in school,it sure is a depressing thing especially for a stylish kid like Rayoushty;)- but Salum do not worry u r a GREAT mom + Raya is a smart girl she will do great in school just like her aunt mayoush hahaha just kidding she will be just like her dad & mom the best in everything;)
cheers